Last weekend we attended a marriage conference at our church. After almost ten years of marriage, I feel like I’m in the perfect spot to receive instruction on this topic – I am keenly aware of how much help I need!
I really appreciated that the sessions were framed around specific passages of Scripture. There’s certainly value in learning helpful tips from other married couples, but I can’t change my marriage by just watching what others do and copying their behavior. God’s Word is the only thing that brings lasting hope and change in me (which then brings hope and change to my marriage).
Today I’m sharing some of my notes with you! These are the things that stuck out to me the most – some of these things were just comments that the speakers made in passing, but they resonated with me. I hope they encourage you, too!
God cares more about your marriage than you do.
This statement really struck me. I’ve never felt more alone than I have at times in marriage. The reminder that God is on our side and at the same time on MY side, that He is for marriage and that He can overcome anything we face in marriage – that is good news.
But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you. –Romans 8:10-11
Our connection with each other should reflect our connection with God.
He is always pursuing a love relationship with us, so we reflect Him by continually pursuing a love relationship with our spouse.
Marriage requires maintenance.
The verses found in Romans 8 can serve as a mission statement for your marriage:
Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
Marriage requires constant maintenance, and the actions in those verses are the steps we need to take in maintaining it.
Marriage is hard work.
A bad marriage is harder than a good marriage. It is important to pray for my marriage, but praying without doing any work is like asking God to help me get an A on a test for which I have not studied!
If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. James 1:5-8
It was for all those reasons that we attended the conference last weekend. We don’t have a perfect marriage (we actually argued all the way home on Friday night), but we have one that is being transformed by God’s Word with God’s grace. ❤
More encouragement for your marriage: